Confession 13: I LOVE Tycoon Games

July 15th, 2010 at 8:44 am -

Hotel Giant. School Tycoon. Mall Tycoon. Rollercoaster Tycoon. EVEN ZOO TYCOON! Yes, I had them all. Am I ashamed? Heck no, not even in the slightest.

Ever since I played my very first copy of Theme Hospital, Tycoon games have had a place in my weird little heart. I could never figure out if it was the absolute power or the hilarity in them, but they were just so amazing.

The basic premise of a tycoon game is to, well, do whatever the fuck you want. In the words of our best friend Wikipedia, Tycoon games are defined as ‘a comprehensive mix of business and simulation’. So you have your basic mission (e.g. build a hospital), and that’s it. Go build your fucking hospital.

Granted, the graphics were never that good. And, yes, it got too damn hard at times. But something about them was always so addictive. I can remember back in the good ‘ole days, times in my youth when I played Theme Hospital for hours on end. I’d play the whole game, even the damn secret level. And when it got to the end, and the credits rolled, I turned it off and put in a new game right? No. I did it again. And again.

To be honest, I could probably tell you everything about that game.

I loved the replayability on the things as well. I could play the same level on School Tycoon, and I’d build things in different places, get different grades through the school year, and that tornado would always come at different times to screw me over! IT WAS GREAT! Okay, not all the time, but elements of it were good.

I guess it shares the same kind of love that I have for RTS’, in the sense that I basically love being in complete control of a game and the outcome from my actions. Take Lord of the Rings: Battle for Middle Earth, leading Gandalf and Frodo on to defeat Sauron was an incredible feeling. In the exact same way as seeing hundreds of happy customers riding on the best rollercoaster in the world was an incredible feeling.

And that’s what I feel the tycoon was invented for; so those power hungry humans can control the environment they want and either create a utopia or a dystopia. And I think those people deserve a fucking medal.

So I say screw you Infinity Ward and Rockstar, I don’t want to play your chart topping, block buster shoot ‘em ups. No I don’t. I want to run my own god damn school. Or hospital. Or zoo…